“Every new beginning comes from some other beginning’s end.”
– Roman Stoic philosopher Seneca
In all of my studies about caring for ourselves and taking care of a brain, boundaries are constant. Having boundaries with people, electronics, your stuff, time, and your thoughts. The list is rather long. Part of having healthy boundaries that support us is knowing when to say good-bye and how to do that.
Years and years ago one of my first coaches did an end of the year closing group coaching and then a week later did a start of the year opening group coaching. The results of those two one-hour sessions were profound to me. I hadn’t expected much from it, I figured I would get a little insight from my time. Instead, what I got was some thought boundaries from one year to the next. So, any misguided, wasteful, time-sucking thoughts I could identify I questioned to the end to realize that they were a complete waste of life and the others I found solutions to bring into the next year. We also took the time to find the lessons in the experiences in the outgoing year. About a day after the closing group coaching a wave of calm came over me and I realized it was the moment I let go of the past year and all of the things I was not able to control or do-over or complete. It was all in yesterday and no longer in today’s thoughts.
Then a week later we did the opening group coaching and my goal creation was better than it had ever been. I was clearer about my goals, clearer about what actions I needed to take, and clearer about the fact it would take more than a year to get there, it might even take a lifetime for some of my goals. Within a day I was filled with excitement for the coming twelve months.
This is my wish for you in the coming days. That you take a moment to put closure on the ending year by getting out a piece of paper and answering these questions and then welcome in your dreams and goals for the next year.
I am not going to give away my whole end of the year closure coaching, I will share a small part of it.
Start with two sheets of blank paper. Write out the answers to the questions on the paper. One sheet for closing the year and one sheet for opening the new year.
Closing Out The Year Sample Questions
- What surprises happened in the last year?
- How did you deal with them? Describe where you were your best and highest self or where you were less than your best? (the more you add details with emotions the better.)
- Would you do things differently? Describe in detail
- What did you learn about yourself and your reactions?
- Where did possibility show up in the last year for you?
- How did you engage with it?
- How did it feel to lean into it?
- In the last year, what goals were you able to achieve?
- What is the best thing to come out of the last year?
- In one sentence, summarize the last year, take a deep breath and really think about all of the events.
NOW – re-read what you wrote and then tear up the piece of paper. It is complete!
Welcome The New Year Sample Questions:
First start with writing out a story: A year from now on January 1st I am going to be telling you all about the last twelve months and the story will go something like this.
(Write out what you will be telling your close friends twelve months from now)
It starts something like this.
O my goodness what I year. It has just been so filled with____________. (add a positive word) I was able to ______________ and then..
From this story, you should be able to see what you are really dreaming of making happen over the next year.
- List out the actions in your story
- Then list out the steps you would need to take to make that dream a reality
- Then add dates to those action steps
- Then add those actions to your calendar
- Then plan to read these goals each month and put that into your calendar
Create a visual for you to connect daily with your new goals for the coming year. (word doc, PowerPoint, video, vision board, photo book, poster, excel sheet)
Most of all I recommend that you find some time to do some relaxing and nurturing experiences. If you don’t feel you have the time, I highly recommend you ask for some help to find the time. You deserve a moment to think straight. We all do.
Chris Bailey, the author of “The Productivity Project”, says that downtime is as important to productivity as the time you use to get things done and he tested and proved it.
I wish you all the best in the coming year. If you are having a hard time creating your goals for the next year or finding it hard to stay focused and engaged in your life it might be time to talk to me about what is possible with success coaching.