I am going to start a series of articles about neurodiversity and trauma. (That is a hint that you can do a search and find more articles on this topic by using the categories on the right.)
Why you might be asking? Because it is most common for people with ADHD, dyslexia, and autism to have also experienced trauma.
That trauma leaves a neurological shift in the chemistry of their brain and too often people don’t even know this has happened and never address it.
Unresolved and unaddressed trauma is like a really bad GPS system guiding to be even more lost.
You see that’s the difference between high-achieving successful different thinkers and the neurodivergent person’s life in and out of prison.
It’s one of the least talked about outcomes for many people with ADHD, dyslexia, and autism.
Did you know that over 70% of the people incarcerated have a neurodiversity?
There are three key differences between those making six figures and those living behind bars and trapped in the cycle of the criminal justice system.
- The number of people supporting them
- The ability to adjust their mental health in a positive way
- Luck
Trauma: A Brief Overview (via AI)
Trauma is a deeply distressing or disturbing experience that overwhelms an individual’s ability to cope, often causing lasting emotional and psychological harm.
It’s important to note that what constitutes trauma is subjective and varies from person to person.
Do you know how to work through your stuffed feelings?
At this point, I know that all of my clients are professional feeling stuffers when I first start working with them unless they have spent some years in therapy.
What does it mean to be a feeling stuffer? It means that often when a person has a negative feeling, instead of expressing it, they don’t allow themselves to feel it, they ignore it and quickly move on.
It is called stuffing because the feelings don’t leave the body that way and feelings have a chemistry to them. They cause the body to react and be ready for things, even if nothing is happening.
I was professionally trained on how to stuff my feelings by two parents with acute PTSD. Growing up it was often not safe to express how I was feeling so I would stuff those feelings out of my mind.
Now that I know that I do this I have a way to work through those feelings quickly after leaving a space that didn’t feel safe to share or when I knew that I was fearful while doing something so I was full of negative comments.
This is the process I use and that I teach my clients. (they have all modified this to their way of thinking)
I email the Universe/God/The Divine/Space or Micky Mouse
I pull up my email app and I just let all of the negative, judgy, mean, and hot feelings I have in me fly. I try to justify them at times.
I sometimes read it a few times just to make sure I got it all out and then I take a deep breath and type out all of the really good, interesting, fun, loving, kind, and supportive things that I have in my mind.
I take another deep breath and then I delete the whole thing.
How to Release Stuffed Feelings Process
- Journal – using paper, phone, or tablet – you will be tossing this in the trash, so you don’t need any special paper. The great thing about email on your phone or tablet, you can dictate your thoughts and it will type them out for you.
Just let fly all of the negative, judgy, mean, and hot feelings you have floating around your head. - Get it all out – add any extra justification or story you have about why it is OK for you to feel this way.
- Take a BIG Deep Breath and let it out.
- Let fly all of the really good, interesting, fun, loving, kind, and supportive thoughts floating around in your head.
- Take a BIG Deep Breath and let it out.
- Delete the email or Tear-up your paper and toss it.
By doing this process you can locate the true feelings that you might need or want to take action on. All the rest are just your fears being triggered and you not knowing what to do in the moment and stuffing the feeling. Perfectly normal for all humans.
If you have ADHD you are a human that might process a lot of information, more than the normal person, and that might mean you have even more feelings stuffed.
That’s why it is an important thing to learn to process your trauma in the moment and move on without all those fear and frustration chemicals trapped in your body.
For bonus recovery from unpacking stuffed feelings watch 10 minutes of something that makes you laugh or feel amazing. (Baby animal videos work well for this.)
Do you have a process you use? I would love to hear it.
How do you work through your tough feelings?
Check out other articles like this one. If you would like to learn more about which life hacks could transform your life, schedule a free coaching call with me.
Thanks,
JoyGenea